Wherever you are right now, I pray that God is the center of your heart. I pray that you, too, desires to please Him, that you are seeking Him more than you are looking for me. I never prayed for you to come in my life before. Maybe that is why we haven’t met yet. However, right now, I often wake up in the middle of the night with a creeping loneliness in my heart. I feel so empty and there is this part of me that longs to know you, that longs to meet you soon.
Right now, more that anyone or anything else, I pray that God will ease the loneliness in my heart. I pray that He will replace this with patience. I know I am such a wreck right now and it would be so unfair if you will meet me in my current state. You would probably dislike me coz my cracks are so visible, you might even be devoured by it.
I am a work-in-progress and I would definitely want that you will meet me when I’m fully functional, not that I would be completed anytime soon because I know completion is such a long process. I pray that when we finally meet, you will love the cracks and the quirks, you will appreciate the weirdness of how my life is organized, you will accept the darkness of my past and you will still be there to illuminate the path towards my future, a future that I am so willing to share with you.
I am scared, you know. Scared that you might not be able to find me. There are moments when I would just try to figure out and imagine how are you or what are you up to. I am so excited to hear your stories and to share mine as well. Please don’t arrive soon though because I feel I still have so much fixing to do in my life. However, please pray for me that I will be fixed soon, that God will heal me sooner so that I will be whole again when I will finally meet you.
I long to see you. I long serve God with you. And most especially, I long to grow old with you.