Para sa gusto nang mag-move on
Sa mga ayaw nang mag-hold on
Sa mga pagod nang masaktan
At takot nang maiwan.
Sa mga pusong sawi
Luhaa at duguan
Sa mga matang pagod nang umiyak
At mga kamay’ng wala nang kahawak.
Wag kang mawalan ng pag-asa
Puso mo may nagdurusa
Pasasaan ba’t ikaw din ay liligaya
Matatagpuan mo rin siya
Ang taong sayo’y magpapasaya
Hindi na kailanman mag-iisa
Dahil sa bawat paglubog ng araw
May kamay na hahawak sayo
At sa bawat bukang-liwayway
May mga bisig na yayakap sayo.
Kapit lang,
Darating ang araw
Ngiti sa iyong mga labi
Ay muling matatanaw.

Posted in Rhythms and Rhymes

Where Does Love Go When It Dies

True-Love-Never-Dies-Pictures-Photos

If the heart is the place where love comes,
Then where does it go when it dies?
Back to the heart where it comes from?
Or turn into tears in the eyes?

But even if one knew the answer
What would one possibly gain
Would the knowledge of where love has gone through
Ease the heartaches, the pain and the sorrow.

Why is it one cannot quite realize
What a blessing this true love can be
Must one love to know it it priceless?
Must one be blinded before one can see?

Ah! Where does love go when it leaves us?
This question will always remain
For we will know the answer
Until we love again.

AUTHOR’S NOTE:

I happened to have found this composition somewhere in my old files. I cannot recall writing it so I cannot really take credit to it. This is written in a grungy bond paper through a typewriter. I can’t imagine how old this may have been composed given the manner of how this was written. But nonetheless, this is such a beautiful poem that I can’t resist not to publish. It has made me asked myself too. Where does love go when it dies? Where does it go when it leave us? Or does love really leave and die?

I think love never leave one’s heart nor it dies. It remains (1 Cor 13:13b) forever. However, the pain, the heartache, the sorrow – they usually overpower love.And when they rule our hearts, we tend to believe that our love dies. They say there is a thin line between love and hate and one cannot exist without the other. Therefore, hate cannot exists without love and so is the latter without the previous. Bottomline: LOVE REMAINS FOREVER.

Stay in love. Stay in God’s love.

Sarah Dawn 🙂

PHOTO CREDIT

Posted in Food for Thoughts

A Poem by Russell Kelfer

It is my second day in reading “The Purpose Driven Life” by Rick Warren. Actually, this is the nth time of trying to complete the 40-day journey with this book. I always fail to finish the book even though how much I wanted to. I hope this time around, I will be able to make it to the end of the 40 days.

Anyway, I was reading the passage for Day 2 and at the end of the article, a poem by Russell Kelfer was written.

you-are-who-you-are-for-a-reason

I feel like my heart was pierced and I cannot help the tears from falling down my eyes.

“God love you.”

He loves you and me more than anything He has ever created. He created us so he can express his LOVE.

“No, that trauma you faced was not easy and God wept that it hurt you so. But it was allowed to shape your heart so that into His likeness you’d grow.”

I often feel alone these past few days. Every failure, every mistake, every wrong decision seem to magnify the loneliness and emptiness in my heart. I fail to realize that God is there too. He is weeping with me as each tear fall. He felt bad for me every time I fail or make a wrong decision. But despite all the darkness I was in, God is there, constantly telling me that HE LOVES ME.

“BUT I WAS TOO STUBBORN TO REALIZE THAT.”

I was too preoccupied in making everything right and covering every bit of mistake that I fail to appreciate that He is shaping through all the pain.

God loves me. He loves us all.

 

Stay in love. Stay in God’s love!

Dawn 🙂

Posted in Food for Thoughts

Pitter-Patters on The Roof

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She stares blankly on the pouring rain. The noise of the pitter-patters on the roof is trying to drown the voice from within. There are so many voices lately that she cannot figure out which is true and which is not. She wished she could stay curled in her bed all day, curved like a ball in the hope that doing so could lessen the emptiness she felt inside. The booming thunder cannot surpass the thuds of her heart as it beats faster and faster like raising thunderbolts across her chest. With each thud comes heaviness of breathing she cannot define. It seems like someone is trying to gag her mouth and want her dead by suffocation. Yes, death would be such a welcoming treat because it would mean silence from all the voices she cannot even understand. It would mean relief from all the emptiness inside. It would mean comfort from all the pain she kept hiding inside.

“Ahhhhhhhhh! Noooooo! Heeeeellllpppp!”

Three loud shouts came out of her mouth. And not long after, her mother rushed to her side. She’s been like that for the past three months. Panic attack is her frequent visitor. Her mother hugged her, trying to calm her down. Her shirt is soaked in sweat yet her palms are cold and white. Fear is painted across her face as if someone is trying to hurt her. As tears slowly fall from her eyes, as the heaviness of breathings starts to subside, she felt the soothing calmness of the pitter-patters on the roof.

She is a survivor and she will overcome all these madness she is currently facing. Whatever it takes, how long it may take, she will survive. Life has been bad lately. Things aren’t turning out the way she planned them to be. But she is hopeful, she will make it through.

She stares outside again but this time, no pouring rain. Instead, painted across the sky is a promise, a hope of a better, colourful tomorrow. She will still have panic attacks, that’s for sure. But death is never an option.

Life is beautiful! Never give up when problems try to pull you down. Believe that everything will be alright.

Stay in love! Stay in God’s love!

Dawn 🙂

 

Posted in Food for Thoughts

This Is Me…

No, this is not me giving up. This is me wanting some silence. I want to turn off all the thoughts in my head. I want to forget all the pains inside my heart. I want to just feel nothing nor remember anything nor think of anyone or anything. I just want to be numb from all the troubles that I am going through right now and feel nothing. Yes, amnesia would be such a welcoming treat. It would be such an awesome experience, to be able to forget everything including the hurt, the pain, the failure, the downfall, and be able to start a clean slate. But no, amnesia is not an option.

You have no idea what I am going through. You cannot imagine how desperate I am to escape this situation that I am into. You have no idea how much I wanted to be happy, to be carefree, to be liberated, to do anything I want without thinking about what other people might say.

No, this is not me becoming rebellious. This is just me wanting to experience life without hesitation, without limitation, without apprehension or reluctance. This is me wanting to escape the patterns of my current life and to embrace the randomness of things. To sail on uncertain seas, to travel on roads not taken, to go on an adventure towards the unknown with the knowledge that death is part of the journey and those that won’t bring death to me will only strengthen me. I wanted to fail, to fall, to be on my knees and feel hurt so that I will find the courage to stand up and continue the journey.

I hate the predictable. I want to embrace the unknown. I despised the patterns and elaborate plans. I want to take random trips to the abyss of failure. The sense of security makes me want to throw up. It makes me nauseous despite the fact that I have only stayed on the sidewalks all my life. I have watched my life pass me by. I have not taken anything on the speedy highway where accidents and failures might happen. I stayed on the comforts of the sidewalk and still I end up feeling such a failure. I wish I have taken those risks, dived into the unknown, failed and embrace falling apart.

No, this is not me becoming weak. This is me embracing the reality, the truth that none of us is invincible, me included. That I have weaknesses too, I am flawed, I am imperfect. This is me wanting to leave the perception of other people, to live in a place where no one knows me and no one expects highly of me. I want to be released from all the pressures and assumptions. I am who I am and I am not as successful as you think I am. I did some wrong turns and miscalculated decisions and now I end up being just a plain Jane instead of a well-seasoned, successful Oprah. I am nobody and please, don’t rub that on me. I am beginning to dislike myself, these insecurities growing inside me, eating my whole being alive. I wish I could care less. However, I am not wired that way. I always pay attention to other people’s thoughts about me. I am always that little girl who wishes to please everyone in the hope that they will like me. But honestly, I am so tired of pleasing all of you. I am so weary of catering to all your expectations.

This is me saying that this is all you get out of me, and yes, I am giving you some issues to talk about. This is me telling you that this is all I can offer and I am no longer in the business of pleasing anyone. Starting at this very moment, I will make stupid, miscalculated decisions. Who knows, I might get a tattoo one of these days, a random decision, made out of the blue by someone who used to live according to a pre-planned life. Because honestly, this pre-planned life is such a boring life. I have regretted living inside the box, along the sidewalks, and inside the confines of my shell. Today, I resolve to experience every bit of stupid mistake just so I can say that I am alive and living the life that I deserve. This is me saying THIS IS LIFE.

Never fear the unknown. If the unknown will cause you to stay in the sidewalk then you’re making the worst decision of not embracing the uncertainty and chaos.

Posted in Food for Thoughts

12 Insights Learned From A Broken Heart

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At some point in our lives, we go through pains of broken heart and broken relationships. In man’s pursuit for love, pain and suffering is inevitable. However, in every pain and suffering one goes through, we can always learn and gain insights that can equip us in moving forward and in trying to love again. These lessons make us stronger in facing life’s struggles and challenges.

I have my fair share of pains, human as I am. However, I am grateful for all the teachings life has given me. I hope that these insights will also inspire everyone to believe that love is just around the bend and that no failure is truly a failure, but are blessings-in-disguise and lessons in life.

1. Never love someone’s possibilities

You are the optimist. You believe that there is goodness in every one. You know that someday, he will change and you will live happily ever after. However, after one year, three years or maybe seven years, he is still the same a**h*le that he is. You get frustrated. You started to fight and little did you know, the relationship started to fail. It is going the drain or sinking in the sand. And where did it leave you? You were left broken, empty, and pained. Why? It is not because the relationship fails. It is not because you end up walking away from each other and living separate lives. The main reason is you hold on to a possibility of him – of him changing into someone you envisioned, someone you wanted him to become. You love some alter ego, unrealistic personality that you expect him to be. Loving is accepting who he is without the thought of transforming him into a perfect guy in a shining armor. Never love someone’s possibilities. You’ll end up hurt, broken, and frustrated.

2. You cannot give what you do not have

An empty well cannot give fresh water. Likewise, a person full of hurt and pain cannot give real love. Hurt and frustration will only lead to distrust and suspicions. That is the reason why, every broken person should properly heal before engaging in another relationship. You can never give love if inside your heart, all you feel is pain. Let yourself heal before you enter into a new relationship. You can never love with all your heart if it is not whole in the first place.

3. You are more than enough but sometimes others can’t see it

After every failed relationship, we often ask ourselves what went wrong or why we weren’t enough for him. I learned that being enough is so subjective. You may be lacking for him but never let that get the best in you. A person who will tell you that you’re not enough or that you’re not who they dreamed of being with is selfish because they only think of their own happiness and contentment. Anyone who told you that you’re not good, you’re not worth it, and you’re not enough for him is someone who is not completely happy with their lives. A happy and contented person will never need anyone to complete them or fulfill any function in their lives because they can survive on their own. Look for someone who wants and not needs you. If he needs you, once that need is not met or if someone is able to supply that need rather than you, he will eventually leave you.

4. Don’t sacrifice your happiness to save a relationship

If the relationship is depriving you the chance to be happy, it is a red flag. It’s time to let go. We all need to be with someone because it amplifies the happiness that we have. Once you are not happy with the relationship, you have to rethink about keeping it. We all make sacrifices when it comes to relationship. However, if it reaches the point that your own happiness is jeopardized, it’s time to re-evaluate.

Likewise, never look for happiness in a relationship. It should start from within you. You must be truly happy being single for you to be happy being in a relationship. Never seek happiness from someone else.

5. Learn when to hold on and when to let go.

Sometimes, holding on is more painful than letting go. It is like holding on to a piece of rope, the tighter your grip is, the more abraded your hands become. The friction between your hands and the rope will only create wounds or will give you calloused hands. Likewise, staying in a bad relationship will only bring you pain. It will hurt you physically and emotionally, and remember that emotional pain is very difficult to heal. Learn to let go when holding unto it becomes painful. Learn to let go before you find yourself hardened by all the pain. Save yourself and walk away. And if they are hurting you physically, I’m telling you, RUN – do not just walk away  but run away from that person.

Continue reading “12 Insights Learned From A Broken Heart”

Posted in Epistles of the Heart

A Letter of Encouragement To All Broken-hearted

Originally posted here

To all who are hurting:

I know you — the heartbroken.

I’ve been there recently, and plenty before. I know you better than you think I do. I know heartbreak as well as I know the taste of the ocean in my tears and the way my breath gets stuck in my heart instead of my throat. I know you’d assume I would say that I wish I didn’t.

You’d think I wouldn’t wish heartbreak on anyone, but I am happy to tell you that I am grateful for it. I am grateful to have been you and gotten to know misery’s soul because from there you see the beauty at heartbreak’s wake.

I know what it’s like to curl up into a ball and feel pain if you move from the only corner of your bed that still feels safe. I know what it’s like to bury yourself in your palms and in your memories. I know what it’s like to dig so deep for answers that your fingers start to bleed.

I know what it’s like to cry when you wake up and realize yesterday wasn’t just a dream. I know what it’s like to walk with two feet that don’t feel like your own. I know what it’s like — to feel alone.

I know what it’s like going in circles because you see your past on every corner. I know what it’s like to hate the silence but hate the sound of memories more. I know what it’s like to question moments, and also milliseconds, phrases, facial expressions, and empty kisses.

I know what it’s like to be lost but only because you’re so terrified to open your eyes and find yourself alone. I know what it’s like to be drunk from your tears and sober from the pain.

I know what it’s like, trust me.

I know what it’s like to be a mess and to be heartbreak’s biggest success. I know what it’s like to be a fool, to be naïve, and to be all the things a young woman should never be. I know what it’s like to lose my dignity and misplace my faith. I know what it’s like to miss my laugh and forget my smile.

I know what it’s like to carry regret with you on a chain around your neck. I know what it’s like… knowing that the whole world sees you falling and no one is following you down. I know what it’s like being down there and seeing the world go on without you.

What else do I know?

I know that the darkness fades, and that your smile has the power to light up the sky like the country’s brightest 4th of July. I know that the sun always eventually shines through the clouds, and when it doesn’t you learn to dance in its shadows and in the rain that falls like glitter from the sky.

I know that the pain will always be a memory, but I know that memories won’t always be painful. I know that you don’t just learn to walk again, but you learn to run to new dreams, to old dreams, and to all things.

I know that you could carry regret with you to your grave, but if you let go of it – if you let go – you can fly right out of heartbreak. I know that the sappy words came too easily, but I know that eventually you’ll have nothing melancholy to say. I know that the taste of your laughter will taste better than your tears.

I know that the day comes where you stretch out in an empty bed grateful for the space. You’re grateful for the space between the sheets and for the space to grow into who you’re meant to be.

Do you trust me? Because I know you, and I’m so happy that I do. Because this – all of this – I’m telling you this not to make myself feel better, not to make a scene, not to lie to myself like I used to when I wrote about heartache. I’m telling you this because I believe that it is true. I made it, and so can you.

I made it long ago but now it’s okay to go back to help you because it doesn’t hurt to remember anymore. Know that. Know that it really doesn’t hurt forever. You fall for strangers in coffees shops and get butterflies for faces in grocery aisles. You sing along to songs you used to hate.

You dream of wedding dresses and “the someone right”“the someone true”“the someone else” to watch you walk down an aisle in it.

I’m happy to report that that stupid line “time heals all” is true. Now I am resilient. Now I am happier alone than I ever was together. Now I know what I want and what I don’t. Now I can smile at the past and flirt with the future. Now it’s your turn. I know you – you can do this.

 

Stay in love. Stay in God’s love!

Dawn 🙂